A day in Kowloon City

When Tutors become God

Nowadays going to a tutorial class after school is a must for Hong Kong students especially to those who are taking open exams in the coming year. Students & their parents believe that going to regular school alone is not enable them to achieve good grades, and going to tutorial class can somehow empower them and turn them from a C to a A student. There are always rumors about some tutors somehow obtain some of the questions which will be on the open exam, and students will go burn their parents hard earned money on the tutor. When I think about it, those brand name tutorial schools are like the famous brothels and those high salaried tutors are like the biggest ho's in town. Students pay certain amount of money, go to the classes and sit for awhile while the tutors entertain you and give you what you need. Isn't that great?

Despite the effectiveness of going to tutorial classes, one thing that bothers me the most is how people see the teachers nowadays. In my opinion, teachers are always highly underrated. Teachers never get the respect they deserve; on the other hand, tutors are protrayed as God. Just looking at the billboards and the advertising for tutors in Hong Kong, and I am disgusted by every single one of them. What the fuck happened to Hong Kong educations? What the fuck is wrong with this generation? It's not hard to imagine if you ask a kid what does he want to be when he grows up, some of them will go "I want to be a tutor cos I want to be a millionaire and have the respect that I don't deserve."

Robot Cop is not our imagination anymore......

Yao Ming

Me and my friends were in a restaurant watching the Olympics men basketball game a couple days ago. It was China vs. Germany. During half time, my friend brought up a question regarding the marital status of Yao Ming. We all agreed that he's single and some of us were wondering if he's got a girlfriend? Chinese or White? Is he sleeping with a lot of white chicks? How about Chinese ladies?

My friends kept on talking regarding to the topics and then I suddenly thought... hey they were not asking the real question. The real question should be "is there any Chinese lady able to sleep with Yao Ming?"

We all know that Yao Ming is like 8 feet tall with a foot and a half long penis. I highly doubt that there is one Chinese lady on this motherfucking planet earth able to ride this fucking monster Chinese cock. If Yao Ming is married to a Chinese lady, I'm pretty sure the Chinese lady will feel like she's giving birth to his penis every fucking night. You may even see her funeral on her wedding night. On the other hand, white ladies wouldn't have this kinda problem if you know what I mean. So Yao, do what you got to do, go find a big pussy.

But what if God plays a crude joke on him?  How about Yao Ming actually has a baby dick? What if he has a 4" dick on a 8 feet tall body? If that's the case, I wonder what he feels like going to shower room with all other players (you know what they say about black people) after each game. Player#1:"Where is your dick Yao?" Player#2:"Let me show you a real dick Yao!" Yao:"Oh...... um...... I'm taller than you...... ...... fucker!"

For me, I choose to believe Yao has a hugh dick. I believe that his dick alone can raise the bar of the-average-length-of-a-chinese-dick by an inch or so. I believe that Yao is my hero. He's Chinese's hero. Not that he's a NBA player, it's just he's got a monster dick.

Highlight of the day

You can hardly get on the subway in Hong Kong during the rush hour. Everyone pretty much has to squeeze in in the morning to get to work. I had a magical moment at a subway station a couple days ago and it went like this... ...

I was on a platform lining up and waiting for the subway to arrive. The train arrived and I couldn't get on 'cos the train was packed already. I saw a caucasian lady managed to get on and she was standing right at the door and that's when the magical moment began.

The beeping sound was on and the door started closing. Something was stuck between the doors and the doors couldn't close completely. Believe it or not, THAT SOMETHING WAS THE CAUCASIAN LADY'S ENORMOUS BREAST. The caucasian lady, was in her late 20's, skinny with a pair of F-cup boobs (like a double head lollipop). I was standing right in front of her and witnessed this unbelievably awkward moment. Of course it's painful to see those tits squeezed like they've never been squeezed before, and they were like turing into two gigantic eyes staring right at me. The doors opened again and those poor titties released. The commuters inside the train puzzled over the reason of the doors opened again, and I could tell that they got a bit annoyed. The lady, feeling embarrassed, then decided to turn around and let the ass facing me. She thought it would help since her boobs were not sticking out.

WRONG!!! This time it's her big round booty which stopped the doors from closing. I was like holyfuck... it will never happen to Chinese girls.

The door opened again, and the commuters inside still had no clue of what's going on. The lady felt embarrassed and had no place to hide. At the moment, I felt like I have to do something as a gentleman. So when the door closed again, I decided to step up and help this lady. I went up and smacked that ass so hard that the whole ass was wobbling. I "flattened" the protruding area of that big ass and the doors closed with no problem. All the people behind me applauded. I even saw that lady turned her head around with teary eyes, and looked at me and said Thank You. I'm still not sure if the people applauded to my kindness or they were just amazed by the body of the lady. At the end of the day, it just feels so great to help people, and be able to smack some ass.

The Culture of "Queuing Up"

Hong Kong people will understand what I'm talking about by just looking at the title. Lining up is part of our lives. We need to line up for bus, subway, breakfast, lunch, dinner, some brand name stores like LV, you name it. It doesn't matter if you are rich or poor, you always have to line up for what you want.

And it gets me thinking.... why the fuck do I always have to line up? Why do people line up? Can I choose not to line up? Does lining up symbolize something? All this questions got me some insight to this society.

Lining up equals to first come first serve. That's a sign where equal opportunity occurs. Equal opportunity seems a way to go, so does lining up mean fair to everyone? Is lining up a correct way to distribute/receive resources? What if my situation is more desperate than yours? What if my need is much great than yours? Can I be put ahead of you? if so, who decides who should be first and next? Or lining up is just a general idea of a mean for people to provide/receive goods and services in a fair manner. Is there a better way to do this?

Can I skip the lining up process and get what I want? The answer is yes, and I can think of three situations where I can skip the line. 

Option#1: Pay someone to line up for me - I can always find someone to provide the service with me paying the person a reasonable amount of money. As a matter of fact, I know some people in Hong Kong are actually involved in this "lining up for others" business professionally.

Option#2: Have the business valued me as VIP - If I am a loyal customer to a business, I'm sure the owner and servers will attend to my needs whenever I need their service without having me waiting.

Option#3: Bribe those fuckers - However, you need to find those fuckers first. Not many people will take bribe for letting you skipping the line nowadays, but a $100 note still looks very sexy to someone.

At the end of the day, I don't want to line up. I want to get what I want right away. Life is short, I need to find a way to at least cut the line short. But can I achieve it without violating my principle? Can I do it without going against my conscience? Man... Another tough question... man on a quest is here... ...

Randy Pausch

I'm reading a booked called "The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch who recently passed away. I highly recommend this book to everyone. People can youtube Randy Pausch and see the "Last Lecture" online. It's really inspiring. 

Rest In Peace Randy.

WTF......

I went to a drugstore yesterday and I found some anti-hangover pills on the shelves. I took a look of one of those and I was like What The Fuck??? At the back of the packing showed the dosage for 7 to 14 years old is one tablet 3 times a day, and increases the dosage to 2 tablets if older. I was like wow the drug company is so thoughtful and knowing that they have to fulfill the needs of underage drinking on the street. The pills are from Japan and I did not know that the legal age of drinking there is 7!

One more day

I was supposed to leave for Hong Kong in the afternoon today but it did not happen. Now I'm home and writing my blog. What happened was my flight was overbooked and I volunteered to give up my seat to the one in need. Well I actually didn't really "volunteer" to do so, just because the airline was willing to give $400 cash to the one who volunteered so I did. Now I'm still going back to Hong Kong tomorrow with $400 extra in my pocket. Fucking A......

Simply the breast season of the year

Living in Vancouver is awesome. We have the most beautiful girls living in the city. Now we are reaching summer time and it is like a heaven for men because eye candies are everywhere.

While I am busy appreciating God's wonderful creation (women breast), it got me thinking why men loves boobies so much? What do boobies actually do for men? Why can't men stop staring at boobies? You know how hard for me not to check out my lady coworkers in summer time while cleavages can be seen everywhere in the office. I have to constantly remind myself to look at them in their eyes and not their boobs when I talk to them. Whenever I spot a nice cleavage in the office I have to make sure that my lady coworkers are not noticing what I am doing.

I guess that is why we have dress code in the office but no ladies is following. So if they are not following the dress code, is it okay for their male coworkers check them out openly? Can I complement their breast by saying HolyBreast you have there?

And I asked myself this - is it okay for my girlfriend to dress reveallingly in the office? Will I tolerate any men to eye my girl up and down?

Or all girls actually like to show their awesome cleavages? They actually like the attention from guys and make other girls jealous.

Those questions are deep, I need some time to think about it...... 

I want a chimp...

Me drinking Flaming Lamborghini in Malaysia

Computer Ball

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Flobots - Handlebars

An Amazing Video! Great music & lyrics!

Huh? Really? Metallica Sucks? II

So I talked to my friend again regarding his lost of respect for Metallica and I told him what I found on the internet. He explained that he was trying to make a point that Metallica is doing things just for their benefits only. His point of view is Metallica was trying to cease any format of music downloading in the expense of Napster back in 2000 in order to prevent them from losing money, but now the metal boys see the internet is an opportunity (look at Radiohead and Prince) and they try to milk it as much as possible from letting people downloading their music to their videos for a price. So that is why he said at the end of the day Metallica is just about money. Now I understand my friend's point of view and I have to say SORRY FOR SLASHING MY FRIEND ON MY BLOG WITHOUT FULLY UNDERSTANDING HIS POINT OF VIEW, and I think he has a point there.

Huh? Really? Metallica Sucks?

I went drinking with a couple friends last night, and one of them said he lost respect for Metallica due to a recent interview. He said Metallica now agrees that downloading music is not so bad after all, and they are thinking about following Radiohead's lead on allowing fans to download their music for free. And then he started saying Metallica is finally facing the reality, and they finally gave up the battle against downloading music (remember Metallica filed a lawsuit against Napster in 2000?). He went on saying at the end of the day Metallica is all about money and shit. So I asked him where did he hear about it and he said he forgot, so I went home and looked it up online. Here are the information that I found online:

-1) Radiohead never allows fans to download their music for free. Radiohead allows customers to order their latest album online for whatever price that customers think it's worth.

-2) Metallica never agrees to let people to download their music for free. They let fans to download their music for a price, and they did not say they will follow Radiohead's lead. Here's the interview.

So it all got me thinking WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH MY FRIEND? How dumb is that to jump into conclusion without looking further and understanding the matter itself? If I did not look it up online and simply digested what my friend told me, I would have thought Metallica sucks dicks too. So lesson learned - Huh? Really? Metallica Sucks?

Miidio Speakers

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Things could be worse...

I flied from Hong Kong to Vancouver on last Saturday. The weather was nasty that day, and most of the flights were delayed. So I got on the plane with an hour behind its schedule, but that's fine because I was not in a hurry. After about two hours the plane took off, my plane suddenly encountered a turbulence. I could feel the plane shaking and went up and down. It was so bad that it threw a couple flight attendants up in the air. I could hear people screaming, and I almost shat my pants. It only last for three or four seconds, and luckily nobody was seriously hurt. Some passengers had their clothes covered with red wine or cold pops while others were covered with hot coffees. I was on my seat and thinking that things could actually be worse......

What if I was taking a dump at that time? Imagine I was in the toilet stall minding my own business and suddenly the turbulence threw me off the toilet seat. I was panicked and not sure what was going on. And suddenly shits flying all over the stall. If the planes went down and I died,  I would not want to die with shits covered all over my dead body. I do not want the police to tell my mom that, "I'm terribly sorry Mrs Wong. Your son's body is covered with lots of shits and somehow the shits and your son's body melted together, and...... Well Mrs Wong, you can go see it yourself......" 

Or what if the plane did not go down and I was still covered with lots of my own shit. Or what if I had a diarrhea? How the hell was I going to get rid of the shits? That was a 12 hours flight and should I stayed in the toilet stall for the rest of the trip? Those were the questions going through my mind.

Well I am still here so that means I got home okay. I feel so grateful that I am still alive and knowing that things could be worse......